Recovering from Burnout: Why you need to take time off sooner than you think
Why You Need to Take Time Off Sooner Than You Think
You know how it feels like time moves slowly before a planned vacation, tasks seem to be harder to complete, there’s always more laundry than seems reasonable and inevitably something comes up at work that needs your attention right before you leave town?
What if I told you that it doesn’t have to be like that, and really - it shouldn’t be like that. What if there was a way to find more balance, so that the lead up to vacation didn’t feel like a rat race but felt like moving through any other week. What if you could leave for vacation or time off without feeling stressed, worried about what you’re going to miss, who is going to handle things when you’re gone, or what you’ll come back to. What if there was a way to be fully present on your time off so that it’s actually refreshing and not just a pause from chaos that you start worrying about before your trip is even over?
If any of this has resonated with you (I’m looking at you people-pleasers and burned out professionals) then I have good news - you’re not alone, and it really can be different. Yes, even if you’re a busy mom. Even if you have a demanding job. Even if you’re a people-pleaser and it feels really hard to say no. It’s not only possible - it’s essential if you want to be healthy, show up well in your relationships and stop feeling so stressed out all the time. Some stress is normal, but chronic stress isn’t good for anyone. So how do we change that? Let’s get into it.
You probably already know it’s important to take time off, but if you wait until you’re burnt out you waited too long. Taking time off can help with burnout but it’s more of a bandaid - a temporary break before you come back to the chaos that is your work and home life. Part of building a life that feels balanced and isn’t careening towards burnout includes having structure and regular breaks for rest in your everyday life. Taking time off isn’t just vacation - it’s building rest in your daily and weekly life.
Research shows that just a vacation isn’t enough to fix burnout - you have to make changes in your daily life, like not working into the night. It means once you get home or “log off”, you are actually relaxing and having down time. If cooking dinner is relaxing, taking a hot shower, going for a walk, or working in your garden is relaxing then that’s great! - do that. For some people high-intensity exercise can burn off stress, but it’s still important to do something slow and relaxing later that evening before bed. I often encourage my clients to develop a ritual to ‘bookend’ their day, meaning starting and finishing their day with routines that help the brain transition out of work mode and into winding down. If you work into the night every night, eating dinner in front of your laptop or responding to emails at 9pm, you’re keeping your nervous system in an activated state and long-term that can lead to all kinds of physical issues like high blood pressure, weight issues, illness, increased anxiety, sleep issues, and more.
In addition to having hard cut off times for work in the evening, it’s also important to make sure you are doing something fun (or at least not stressful) on the weekend instead of working, and really taking time away from your work phone and email. Something you do because you want to, not because you feel like you have to. Something enjoyable. Maybe that looks like a movie night instead of another activity, or meditating before bed. Maybe it’s a weekend getaway, or a weekend staycation. The options are endless, as long as it’s something that winds you down instead of stressing you out or using more energy that you don’t have.
I’m not going to lie to you - making these changes isn’t easy. You’re going to have to make decisions. You’re going to have to learn how to say no, set boundaries (with yourself and others), ask for what you need, and delegate some things to other people. If you have trouble doing that, I recommend working with a therapist so you can deal with those things and starting setting boundaries and taking care of yourself without feeling guilty - and stop trying to do everything yourself (I’m looking at you, control freaks and people-pleasers) - because trying to do it all is making you chronically stressed, and that never ends well.
TL; DR: Vacations are important, and you should be taking them regularly. But you also need to have balance built in to your everyday life, which means balancing work and family responsibilities with rest and relaxation. Creating balance means setting boundaries, saying no and delegating. If that’s hard for you, find a therapist to help you work through why it’s so hard so you can stop being so stressed out all the time and starting enjoying life again. If you’re in Denver, CO and would like to work on people-pleasing and boundaries, book a free consult now.
DISCLAIMER: This website is for educational and entertainment purposes only; it is not therapy and is not a replacement for therapy. Reading this website does not constitute a provider-client relationship. Consult your licensed physician or licensed mental health provider regarding advice, questions and support for your mental health. Information found on this website should be used only in conjunction with working with a licensed mental health professional or physician. If you are experiencing a mental health emergency, call 911 or 988. Nothing found on this website is intended to be a substitute for professional, psychological, psychiatric or medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Denver Therapy LLC and Ashley French, LPC assume no liability for an actions taken or decisions made in reliance upon, or in response to information contained on this website. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website.